ever since the dawning of the history of mankind, there have been myriads of diversifed inventions, discoveries, and even explorations of the mysteries of the universe. in fact, the human beings are so intelligent that we have solved almost all kinds of problems we have confronted with .

however, nobody has ever made out what the word “love” really connotes, not even the most famous people such as great politicians, saints and philosophers can clarify the meaning of “love”, neither can they deal with the various affairs concerning love. love is like a huge boundless *** that shrouds us all in. we can neither break away from it nor escape from it.

like it or not, we are always entangled in it. it is an invisible *** without any form, that shrouds in different people from different angels; it is a merciless *** that upsets us or even tortures us to death. it is also a supreme *** which almost no human can surpass.

even if they are heroes, emperors, wise men or saints, they can do nothing but show their helplessness in its face. those who can breathe through the holes of the *** should be regarded beyond ***monness and vulgarity. love can bring us temporary ***fort and happiness, but mostly they bring about annoyance and sufferings.

maybe this is the reason why many people have seen through the illusions of the mortal world. however it is not so easy to break away from this boundless, ever-existing and indifferent *** of love.

love is varied and changeable, but roughly it can be divided into three categories: family love, fraternal love and amatory love. not like monkey king who jumped out of the rocks, we were all born after mother's pregnancy of about nine months, hence we have countless relatives without any choice:

parents, grand-parents, and grand-parents-in-law, uncles and aunties, brothers and sisters, etc. and once looking at the genealogical tree, we'll see no end. family love is what everyone longs for, but the warmth and support from our beloved ones are what everyone yearns for the most.

but how many of us are determined to contribute to our beloved one? and how many don't expect repayment and relaxed. conscience even if they have the desire and preparation to contribute to their beloved.

the distance between relatives is different and so are their expectations. but since it's very difficult to know how much we should expect, a lot of worries and distresses emerge.

parents always expect their children to show their filial obedience, or at least pay them frequent visits after they have got married. if the children fail to do this, they feel hurt and upset, and they'll even ***plain about their children, because they just can't understand why their children don't care about them after what they have done for the children for so many years to bring them up. nevertheless, one's experience determines his ideology.

young children are naturally attached to their parents, but when they grow up, specially when they have made their own friends, and got married, what they need most is independence and freedom, and parents sometimes might be***e their burden. once there is generation gap, it be***es more difficult to ***municate and this keeps them away from their parents. objectively speaking, they need more independence in order to achieve success.

in the present society, what the children want to have most is the economic support from their parents, not their moral support or guidance. they would ***plain if your economic support is not up to their expectations. the love from uncles and aunties would naturally dwindle after they have had their own children.

only the love from grand-parents and grand parents-in-law is pure and demands no repayment, and they are also too old to wait for any repayment. as for the distant relatives, their love depends on their needs, just as the old saying goes “the poor have no friends even if they live in downtown while the rich have distant relatives even if they live in deep mountains”. granny liu, a distant kinsfolk, in a dream of the red mansions , claims kinship with the wealthy jia family, thinking that she may benefit from it in some ways.

liu might have run away without any traces if the jia family had been a poor one. another saying goes “close neighbors are better than distant relatives.” the most difficult is to manage the relatives when doing business together, just as what the tv series program liu laogen discloses.

it is all right to stay poor together, but as soon as the business grows prosperous, the group will be***e estranged and even dissolve because of the unfair distribution. family love is like a maze which we shouldn't go too far into it, otherwise, we'll surely get lost. love is a bilateral matter and unilateral love can only lead you to nowhere in spite of your good intentions.

family love is, sometimes, like an arranged marriage, leaving no choices to you. due to the different experiences and tastes, staying together temporarily can be entertaining, while living together for a long time can only be boring due to the lack of ***mon interest and understanding. how can we ***municate with each other without understanding?

parents have the duty to support the children who are not yet economically independent, and children have the responsibility to provide for the elderly parents who are lack of economic abilities to support themselves. except these two kinds of duties which we must fulfill, other kinds of love be***e conventional formalities such as paying visit to the sick or the dead and giving presents to the newly-born etc..

no love among relatives has be***e a normal phenomenon which needn't to be fussed about. what's worse is when love is contaminated by money. sooner or later we will get hurt.

the sooner we get out of this *** of love, the more we can preserve beautiful memories.

we are not living in vacuum, and the society is formed of various kinds of people. as long as we want to live, study, or work, we have to contact, ***municate and cooperate with others. those who enjoy ***mon interests, mutual understanding, ***mon undertakings and ***mon benefits be***e friends.

some friends are called fair-weather friends, because they are together just for entertaining themselves by eating, drinking, and gossiping. once there's nothing to eat and drink, their friendship is finished. some are spiritual friends who share ***mon ambitions, pursuits and education.

“they enjoy talking and laughing with the great talents and never make friends with the good-for-nothings”. the best examples would be yu boya and zhong ziqi of the ancient times who are famous not only for their lofty music but mainly for their lofty characters and mutual understanding and appreciation. they cared very little about material wealth, so their friendship is known as “gentlemen's friendship as pure as water”.

the third type of friendship belong to those who show their utter devotion to each other. they are ready not only to share weal and woe but also to die for each other, like the three brothers liu, guan and zhang in the novel romance of the three kingdoms. .

we all wish to have this kind of friendship, but it's of great difficulty for the ordinary people to be as devoted as they were.

fraternal love or friendship is wide-ranged and flexible. generally speaking, everyone is our friend, just as chairman mao says “our friends are all over the world”. but transcend age, ***, nationality, state and economic conditions.

to them the most important is ***mon benefit, ***mon interest and understanding. friendship is formed during the course of studying, working and fighting. the battle ***panions who have survived many hazards usually enjoy long-lasting friendship.

however, fraternal love is not stable. being away for too a long time, losing all ***mon benefits, friends will be***e estranged. once their interest has changed, they no longer understand each other, and even this would harm friendship.

at all times and in all countries, many close friends and battle ***panions who once worked together and fought together became enemies in the end. quiet a few of the emperors in ancient china even killed those who had helped them found their dynasties. the ****ing heavenly kingdom would not have failed if it hadn't been for the contending and massacring among the those who first rose in rebellion at the beginning of the uprising.

what else we need to pay attention to is that some friends, after being away from each other for too long a time, have lost so much of their original characters that when meeting again, you will feel that you are still the same as you were, while they are no longer themselves. they may have the same feeling about you, so sometimes it's better not to meet each other again. as the chinese proverb goes “friendship can not last for three years and flowers can not stay in blossom for three months”.

it's not so easy to maintain real friendship which needs mutual understanding, tolerance and sacrifice. any kinds of harsh treatment will damage friendship.

amatory love has been a mystery for ages. there's neither a criterion to judge nor a ***mon rule to follow. nobody can tell the exact reasons why love emerges.

it is not always because of beauty (the ugly doorkeeper quasimodo in the hunchback of notre dame is loved by the beautiful gypsy girl e**eralda), nor kindness (hitler also has his mistress), nor wisdom ( even the blockhead may sometimes marry a beautiful girl), nor strength (some love starts from sympathy). true love is like getting an electric shock, shaking our soul. it is a sweet dream, a kind of intoxication, indulgence, and endless passion.

true love doesn't need a long time to grow up, to make clear the family tree of the other, neither does it needs the time to look ahead and behind again and again. love is not marriage, which usually starts from love, but doesn't always depend on love to maintain. long-lasting marriage can eventually turn into a kind of family love, a kind of ***panionship which preserves the ***panion but loses the passion.

love is often an wink of the eye, or a **ile that hints mutual understanding. in spite of the great distance between them, people may fall in love incidentally. hence the saying “a distant marriage is tied up with a mysterious thread”.

love needs passion, and it can stand bumps and stumbles, ups and downs, ***plaints and blames. when it turns into a pool of water, especially dead water, without any billows or waves, it's time for it to die.

delicacies are tasty, but eating everyday can still make one lose appetite. happiness is what everyone longs for, but too much happiness can spoil people who may not care about the happiness they already have. it's universal to live in happiness without knowing it.

the same is true with love. very few people can love the same person passionately all their lives. all love stories ***e to an end no matter how beautiful they are, which also demonstrate the changeability of love.

what one has been chasing wildly may turn into something one wants to get rid of desperately in the end. besides, love is usually blind, especially those who fall in love at the first sight. at the very beginning, both try to demonstrate their beautiful side and cover up their weakness.

fooled by the mysterious color of love, one often mistakes the weaknesses as merits. however, as time passes by, frequent contacts make one bored, and even merits be***e defects, and then the end of love is ***ing. what's more, there are the capricious men and women who never take love seriously, leaving the devoted ones suffering alone.

the saying that the devoted is always abandoned by the heartless has almost be***e the truth of love affairs. what we can't neglect is that love may turn into hatred, and lovers may also be***e enemies. the best proof is the numerous divorces.

even though true love is hard to find nowadays, we still can see some true and infatuated boys and girls who readily give up their families, their parents, their studies, their careers and even their lives for love. they love so passionately, crazily and wildly that they hate anyone who is against their love, and may even harm or kill him if he insists on his objection.

love has magical power that can exploit people's potential abilities, bring people's positive factors into full play, and provide people with the courage to face trials and hardships, to go through life and death, and even to risk universal condemnation. even in the ancient feudal society, some people were courageous enough to carry on clandestine love affairs. the examples in point were the courageous ones who dared to love the concubines of the emperors or the children of their foes.

love also has miraculous power which can startle the universe and move the gods by attracting the heavenly celestials ***ing down to earth ( the love story of the cowboy and the weaving girl ), and by turning ghosts into human ( strange tales of liao-zhai ). love can transcend age and generation (dr. sun yat-sen and madam song qingling; luxun and xu guangping).

love can show contempt for all conventions and prejudices; love can heal wounds and cure diseases, and love can readjust people's state of mind. of course, the result would be the opposite once it hurts.

great men yearn for true love even more than ordinary people. since the ancient times, so many heroes couldn't help falling into the trap of love that the ***-trap has been regarded as one of the 36 stratagems in military tactics. fuchai, the king of the wu state, couldn't be spared of this trap, and generals dongzhuo and lubu fell deeply into it while xiangyu, the king of the western chu state , bid farewell to his beloved concubine in tears.

people may have to pay very high price, even their illustrious name for the love they long for even though it may last for only a very short time. no***heless no one can tear himself away from love. people often say that their earthly affinity is not yet finished, but in fact it is the love affinity that is the most difficult to finish.

love is shapeless and priceless. we can blame nobody when captured by it. love can not be forced, nor can it be pretended.

sympathy is not love, neither is gratitude. love must be generated from the heart, and expressed in actions. it can not be called love without passions and a deep longing from the bottom of the heart.

there's no impassable gulf between family love and fraternal love. some family love may turn into friendship. at the same time, natural barriers doesn't exist either between fraternal love and amatory love.

some friendship may develop into amatory love. the same is true with amatory love which may change into family love after a long time of mutual grinding and polishing.the closer the relationship, and the higher the expectations are, the more difficult it is to get along with each other.

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family love, fraternal love and amatory love are three main human feelings. if handled well, they can bring us extreme happiness, while handled improperly, will bring us great sufferings.

the present society is a world of dazzling money and dwindling human feeling contacts. most people hold a snobbish attitude. they only make friends with people of wealth and of high social status.

just as zhen shiyen said in his expounding of the song “all good things must end” in a dream of the red mansions “while men with gold and silver by the chest, turn beggars scorned by all and dispossessed”. frankly speaking, however, if we regard money the first thing in whichever one of the three kinds of loves, it will depreciate and even be***e worthless.

love can not pretend, nor can it tolerate too much selfish motives. it is reported that an old man in jiangsu province left his million yuan heritage to his young housekeeper instead of his own children, because his own children didn't take care of him while the young housekeeper ac***panied him through his last lonely and helpless years.

love is easily perceivable and perceptible. flattery words may be cheatable, but true love and false feelings can easily be distinguished. if the people you love only know how to spend your money, you should be careful of them.

everyone can help you spend your money if you give them the chance. never turn your love into the slave of money.

love should be selfless, and feelings should be sincere. we shouldn't judge our feelings according to the distance of the relationship. everyone treasures love and nobody can fool himself or the others.

a chinese saying goes: real heroes yearn even more for true love, and great men cherish tender love for their children.

we are the saint on earth, and should treasure our love, but we should know how much is good and where to stop. since there's no ever-lasting banquet, nor is there an endless love story, we should take the gains and losses of love with perfect ***posure. there's fragrant grass in every corner of the earth, and you can always find your love in this world.

translated by zhang baodan

june 20, 2004

中文人类几千年，有过许多的发明创造，有过许多的新奇发现，现在又在探索宇宙的奥秘，但始终搞不懂的就是一个“情”字。包括那些中外的名人、伟人、圣人，一切先哲们，都说不清“情为何物”，都处理不好与情相关的种种事务。情就好比一张无边无际的网、如影随形的网，走到**都被它罩着。

挣又挣不脱，躲又躲不了，欢喜也罢，厌烦也罢，总得被纠缠。这是一张看不见的网。没有固定的轮廓。它会从不同的角度以不同的方式把不同的人网起来。这是又一张无情的网，不仅会让你不开心，还会把人踩死。

这是另一张最高的网，几乎无人能超越。能在这张网上开出一个小天窗，那已经是超凡脱俗了。无论是什么英雄或皇帝，无论是什么圣人或圣人，他们在爱情中都是无助和无助的。

爱情可以给人短期的安慰和幸福，但它却给人带来更多的烦恼和苦恼。这也是许多人想摆脱并看透凡人世界的主要**。但这种无边无际、无时无地、无责无义的网，岂是轻易甩得开的。

情有千种万种，也可千变万化，但归纳起来无非有三，即亲情、友情、爱情。

我们不是孙悟空。我们不能跳出石头。我们将在母亲十月怀孕后被动地出生。于是我们无从选择地有了众多的亲戚：

父母、祖父母、祖父母、五舅、六舅、七姨、八姨、兄弟姐妹，包括堂兄弟姐妹，不计其数。如果续上家谱，宗亲之间更无尽无休了。

家庭爱情是人们所渴望的，但更渴望从家庭爱情中得到温暖和支持。有多少是立志为亲情奉献的呢？即使有奉献的向往和境界，又有多少人在奉献之后不求回报和心理平衡？

亲戚之间的距离不一样，期望也大不相同。但这个度到底是多少，很难把握，一切的烦恼和苦痛也由此而生。

父母总是希望孩子听话孝顺，至少要经常回家。如果不能呢？那就会伤心、难过，甚至抱怨。

父母潜意识里总认为，我把你们供养大，没有功劳、也有苦劳，怎么能不在意我呢？但存在决定意识。孩子们小的时候固然特别依恋也依赖父母，但长大以后，特别是有了朋友、成了家，更多需要的是独立和宽松，父母有时确实成为负担。

如果有代沟，沟通就很困难，家长也会比较回避。客观地说，要想成长为栋梁，需要更多的自主发展。在当今社会，孩子们更希望的到父母的经济帮助，而不是精神上和生活上的指导。

经济慷慨不达标，也会抱怨。至于姑姑、叔叔、舅舅、姨娘，在有了自己的孩子后，这亲情自然会淡薄的。只有祖父母和祖父母对下一代的爱是纯洁的，没有回报的。

他们的年龄也等不到回报。说到远亲，那就看需要。就如俗语所说：

穷在闹市无人问，富在深山有远亲。《红楼梦》里的刘姥姥，就是个八杆子打不着的远亲，看到贾府有油水，就来攀亲。如果穷呢？

那就不知刘姥姥会在哪了。远亲不如近邻。如果是职业，和亲戚一起管理是最困难的。

电视剧《刘老根》揭示得很深刻。穷还好办，发达了一定会因为分配不均而疏远、甚至[你阅读的*来自:范文先生fanwen.

chazidian]散伙。家庭是一个迷宫，不要进入太深，否则你找不到出门的门。感情不是一厢情愿的。即使本意是好的，出发点也是好的。因为很难采取适当的措施，我们仍将踏上不归路。

事实上，亲情有时就像包办婚姻。你别无选择。大家由于经历和生活品味不一样，短暂相聚，还能热热闹闹，长期相处可能会没共同情趣、没有共同语言。语言不通怎么交流？

除了父母对经济尚未独立的子女有抚养义务，子女对年老又经济乏力的父母有赡养义务，必须履行外，有些亲情，已变成生老病死的一种敷衍。是亲戚而无亲情的许多现象，都很正常，不必大惊小怪。如果亲情里沾上了铜臭，那就更不值得留恋了，裂痕只是早晚。

迈步抽身早，还可留存一点美好的回忆。

人不是生活在真空里。人们想要生活、学习、工作和工作。人类是个群体。

你总是要和一些人接触，交流和合作。其中，那些会说话，拥有共同兴趣，共同语言，共同事业和兴趣的人成为朋友。

友情中，有些仅止于吃吃喝喝，东家长，西家短，干不了什么正事，称为酒肉朋友。有一天没得吃，没得喝，也就各奔东西了。有的属于精神型，彼此有些共同理想、追求，有一定的文化底蕴，所谓“谈笑有鸿儒，往来无白丁”，又如古代的俞伯牙、钟子期，高山流水觅知音。

他们对金钱相对要看淡些，因此被誉为“君子之交淡如水”。也有些属于生死之交，彼此肝胆相照、荣辱与共，遇到危难，可以两肋插刀，象《三国演义》中的刘、关、张，誓同生死。人们都希望得到这样的友谊，但实践起来更困难。

友情是一个面积宽，伸缩性大的领域。泛谈，都可称朋友，我们的朋友遍天下。细分，真正成为知已的廖廖无几。

朋友不分年龄（有忘年之交），朋友不分性别（有异性朋友），朋友不分种族、不分国家、有时也不分穷富。最重要的是要有共同的兴趣、兴趣和语言。友情往往是在学业中、事业中、战斗中形成。

那些经历过九次死亡的同志有着深厚而长久的关系。

友情的可变性很大。分别得太久，共同的利害关系没有了，就会日久情疏。因为兴趣的改变，没有共同的语言，甚至不同的意见都会破坏友谊。

古今中外，许多创业的盟友、战友，最后演化为敌人。中国许多开国皇帝（朱元璋等）都杀害了功臣。太平天国如果不是几个共同起事的王者相互争斗残杀，也许不至于半途而废。

我们不得不注意到，一些失散已久的朋友会把原来的模样磨掉。再见面的时候，你会感到你还是你，他已不再是他了。对方也许会有同样的感觉，以致彼此感到见不如不见。

人无千日好，花无百日红。保持深厚的友谊是不容易的，这需要相互理解、宽容和牺牲。任何对彼此的苛求都会破坏友谊。

爱情是个千古之谜。爱情没有统一的标准和习惯法。为什么会产生爱，谁也说不清。

并不一定就是美丽（《巴黎圣母院》中丑陋的看门人也有人爱），并不一定就是善良（希特勒也有**），并不一定就是智慧（傻人有傻命，赖汉娶花枝），并不一定就是强大（有些爱情始于同情）。真爱给人触电的感觉。它是一种心灵的震撼，一种向往，一种陶醉，一种轻松快乐，一种无尽的激情。

真爱并不一定需要日久生情，并不一定需要查清祖宗三代，甚至来不及瞻前顾后。爱情并不等同于婚姻。虽然婚姻常常源于爱情，但并不总是由爱情维系。

婚姻由于旷日持久，到后来常常会转化为一种亲情，一种伙伴关系，虽然相知相伴，却丢失了激情。

爱往往是一个眼神，一个微笑在心里。一见钟情是爱情的多发现象。远在天南地北，竟可以因一个偶然而相互期许，所以，才有千里姻缘一线牵的说法。

爱情是需要激情的。因而她不怕磕磕碰碰，不怕起起落落，不怕一时的抱怨和责难。如果真的变成了一潭清水，甚至是一潭死水，没有浪，没有浪，这种爱就应该消亡。

即便是山珍海味，人们也会吃腻。太多的美丽会宠坏别人而不是珍惜他们。生在福中不知福，是很普遍的。

能够激情永远的人，始终是少数。所以无论多么美好的爱情故事，都会讲完。这些都注定了爱情的多变性。

曾经狂热追求的可能是后来试图摆脱的。而且，许多一见钟情是盲目的。初起，各自都把最好的方面展示出来，而去掩饰自己的不足。

除了爱情的神秘性，经常能看到眼睛，缺点也会被优点所包容。经过长时间和更多的接触，我已经厌倦了。优点也被认为是缺点。那就快结束了。更有一些水性杨花、朝三暮四的男男**，本就把爱情当游戏，认真的一方就吃亏了。

多情总被无情弃，是爱情风月场上的真理。最不可疏忽的是，爱可以转变为恨，爱情可转化为敌情。许多离婚案都是有力的证明。

真正纯洁的男女，虽然不多，但他们真的很愿意。为了爱（也许只是暂时的），他们可以离开家人，背叛父母，放弃学业，放弃事业，甚至为爱而死。那真是，谁反对跟谁急。

也有人爱得痴迷，爱得疯狂，爱得不理智，甚至伤人杀人。

爱情是有一定魔力的。她可以召唤人们的潜能，挖掘人们的力量，调动人们的积极性，让人们在特定的时刻，不怕风雨，不怕艰难，不怕生死，敢冒天下之大不韪。即便在古老的封建社会，人们仍在**，正所谓色胆包天。

皇帝的妃子也有人敢惹，仇人的子女也一样敢追求。爱情不仅有魔力，还有魔力。它可以感动天地，召唤鬼神，把许多看似不可能的极端拉到一起。爱可以让天仙下凡（牛郎织女），爱可以让鬼狐成精（聊斋），爱可以跨越年龄和辈份（孙中山和宋庆龄，鲁迅和许广平），爱可以超越世俗和成见。

爱可以**、**和调解人们的心理。当然，被爱伤害会适得其反。

越是英雄越纵情，英雄难过美人关。自古以来许多英雄豪杰，都因为把握不了自己的方寸而堕入情网，甚至落入温柔陷阱，从而使美人计成为36计中的一计。吴王夫差，未曾幸免。

董卓、吕布深陷其中。西楚霸王也挥泪别姬。人们对爱的追求有时只是一世的，付出的可能是几万，甚至是一生的智慧。

但情又有谁能割舍得了呢？

人们常说，尘缘未了。其实，最难打破的是爱情！

情无形，也无价。做了俘虏，也怨不得谁。但爱不能强求，任何表面都不能掩盖。

同情不是爱，感恩也不是爱。爱情一定要发乎心，成于行。没有心，没有心，没有爱。

家庭和友谊之间没有不可逾越的鸿沟。有些亲情可以演绎为友情。友情与爱情也没有天然屏障，个别的友情也会发展为爱情。同样，恋爱之后，一部分会转化为家庭爱情。

如果人们彼此过于亲近，期望值增加，就会增加相处的难度。所以无论亲情、友情、爱情，都是难度比较大的人情。相处得好，会有极大的欢欣。

分寸把握不好，会带来很大痛苦。能够给你伤害的主要是这三种情感。

目前的社会，金钱耀眼，人情淡薄。人们相交，常常长出一双势力眼。看官位、看金钱。

正如《红楼梦》中“好了歌”的注释所说“金满箱，银满箱，转眼乞丐人皆谤。”但我们可以坦言宣告，这三种人情中，无论哪一种把金钱放在首位，都会使情感贬值，甚至会分文不值。

爱情不能掺假。爱不能包含太多自私的动机。我记得电视上报道过江苏一位老人。在他死后，他把数百万的财产给了他的保姆，而不是他的女儿。因为他的女儿不在乎他，而那个曾经是保姆的女孩陪伴着他最寂寞的几年。

情是一种感觉、感知的东西。花言巧语，虽可生成迷雾，但真情假意是不难分辨的。如果这种情绪只是为了帮助你花钱，你应该保持警惕，因为全世界的人都可以帮助你花钱，只要你给他们机会。

不要把感情变成金钱的奴隶。

爱应该无私，爱应该真诚。无论远近，你都不能欺骗自己。无情未必是真正的英雄，怜子怎能不做丈夫？我们是天地间的圣者，要懂得珍惜情感，收放有度，得失泰然。

天下没有不散的宴席，天下没有讲不完的故事。天涯何处无芳草，天下谁人不识君？

宋远利2003/2/12

《英语演讲稿《情love》出自：

链接fanwen.chazidian

英语必修二演讲稿 【八】